April Fools’ Day was made irrelevant when we invented the Internet and switched to 24/7 International Fools’ Time.
Each prison built is a temple to the failure of a society.
HEALTH TIP: when you’re about to sneeze be courteous and cover your mouth with the nearest anti-vaccination activist.
How to make love last? 1. Know others aren’t actors to be cast in your imagined love story.
2. Don’t just show it on Hallmark days.
Artists shouldn’t kid themselves that most people give a fuck about them directly. At least not at first. People want what you’ve made, they don’t want you. You have to seduce them into also wanting you. And you can only do that by making more stuff that they want, and hopefully attaching yourself to it in the minds of some small percentage of its fans. This is branding.
A bouquet of flowers says: I love you so much I killed something beautiful for you.
A couple generations ago all food on earth was organic and they were like “Fuck that!”
Good morning! Today you can do anything you want! (Anything includes nothing, because leisure is just as important as labor.)
ANNOUNCEMENT: You may only twerk if your skin is darker than Pantone 18-0940 TPX Golden Brown. All others must riverdance.
Q: “Is there anything you envy about women?” A: “Their hold over men.” -Alexander McQueen
DUVET COVERS: where Sudoku meets laundry meets the pressure of putting a condom on a half-on.
Anyone can be an artist. Anyone can be an activist. Anyone can be a journalist. Anyone can be an entrepreneur. Anyone can be a leader.
Our childhood is the explosion, and our adult life is spent examining the shrapnel for purpose.
An Instagram grifter who takes intentionally bad restaurant meal photos and then charges the restaurants to untag them.